Tuesday, April 21, 2015

MOTH(erfucker).

Have you seen the episode of Sex and the City where Samantha gets the flu, and she can't find a man to take care of her? That's kind of how I felt last night...



During my conversation with She Who Shall Not (yet) Be Named (nor will her boyfriend, hence my text override, above), I was complaining about being sick, and freaking out about these enormous moths that somehow keep getting into my apartment. I'm no girly girl; these are HUGE--as She described them, "bat-sized"--and they are infiltrating my apartment by the dozen, I swear.

Everything is worse when you don't feel well. I certainly wouldn't want to chase moths around my apartment when not sick, but I especially didn't feel like chasing them around last night, being sick. After flinging dishtowels at my ceiling for a solid twenty minutes, I managed to get three out of the four intruders out the window, losing the fourth somewhere along the way. Feeling defeated, I crawled into bed and pulled the covers up to my eyeballs, in case I needed to duck from the moth escapee.

What should then land on the floor, nearby? THE MOTH(erfucker). I tiptoed into the kitchen to grab the nearest cup I could find, crept up behind it, and clink! (That's the noise of the cup landing strategically over the moth.) GOT 'EM.

I had to take a picture of my victory and send it to Her. When I did, I somehow thought of that SATC episode, with the independent Ms. Samantha Jones sick and longing for a man to lend a helping hand. That's exactly how I felt. As soon as she regained her health, her self-sufficient attitude came with it--so that's what I'm waiting for: the return of my health and self-reliance. Because honestly? I'm cool with being alone, and doing things both for and by myself. And until then, my neighbor kindly offered her boyfriend to be my mothslayer.

1 comment:

  1. Okay, I'm going to text you and give you shit in the morning about this ridiculous "Her" business, like I'm freakin Aphrodite or something, but in the meantime, why is everyone in your Google circles a freakin model?? LOOK AT THESE PEOPLE ---->>>

    ReplyDelete